


Intimacy at a full stop

by basicallyiwriteshit



Series: Discovering Me [4]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Asexual Character, M/M, asexual!Asahi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-23
Updated: 2016-08-23
Packaged: 2018-08-10 16:36:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 732
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7852783
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/basicallyiwriteshit/pseuds/basicallyiwriteshit
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Asahi doesn't know what's wrong with him, or why he doesn't want to have sex with his boyfriend.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Intimacy at a full stop

“Yuu?” 

“Yeah, Asahi-san?” 

“I--” Asahi bites his lip, frowning when Yuu grinds down on him. “I’m n- I’m not feeling it, tonight…”

Yuu stops, immediately, and looks down at Asahi with a frown. “Again?” 

“I-- I’m sorry! I don’t know why I don’t feel like it this week…” Truth be told, Asahi hasn’t “felt like it” since the two had started being intimate; the idea makes his stomach tighten, and his hands sweat, and not in a good way. In the anxiety way. He doesn’t know why-- he’s ok with kissing Yuu, and making out with him, so why should he be scared to have sex? Yuu is always gentle with him. 

Yuu pulls away and smiles. “That’s fine, Asahi-san! We can just kiss and stuff-- if you’re up to it, still.” 

“B-- But...You’re…” Asahi points to the prominent bulge in his boyfriend’s sweatpants. “Y- You should...You shouldn’t not get release because I don’t w- want to…” 

“It’s no problem!” Yuu says, brushing it off quickly. “I want you to be comfortable more than anything, Asahi~” 

Yuu’s words feel like a punch to the gut. Yuu is so selfless. “O- Ok…” 

The subject doesn’t come up again between them, but it sure does between him and his best friends. 

“I don’t know what’s wrong with me!..” Asahi whines, his head in his arms as Suga coos and rubs his back. “I-- I like Yuu -- love him, even -- but I don’t-- I don’t feel comfortable having sex with him, I-- I’d barely even masturbated before we got intimate, and I always felt gross afterwards, and I just want to be able to please him! What’s wrong with me?!” 

Suga coos, and side-hugs Asahi, but he doesn’t seem to have a reply. 

“Maybe you just need to get used to it?..” Daichi suggests, and Asahi’s head shoots up. 

“Get used to it? Daichi, we’ve been doing  _ it _ for almost a month now! I think I should be  _ used to it _ .” 

“Maybe you’re asexual?” 

Heads whip in Suga’s direction, eyes questioning. 

“A...Asexual?..” Asahi asks. 

“Like, that one where you don’t like anything?” Daichi adds. Suga chuckles and shakes his head. 

“Asexual, as in you don’t feel sexual attraction.” He says, smiling. “What Asahi is describing sounds a lot like asexuality.” 

“B- But, Suga, I’m gay.” 

“You can be gay  _ and _ ace, Asahi.” 

Asahi is confused. So,  _ so _ confused. “I..” 

“I know it’s a lot to comprehend!” Suga rushes, swatting Asahi’s back,  _ hard _ . “So just look into it. I’m not an expert, after all!” 

“O- Okay…” 

So he does just that. And asexual sounds like just the fit for him, and so he tries out the term in his mind. He likes it. It fits. He’s not  _ broken _ , he’s  _ asexual _ . Asexual with a wild boyfriend with an even wilder libido. 

“Y- Yuu, I--” 

“Asahi-san, are you asexual?” 

Asahi blinks. His first thought is to panic, and to run, but when he does just that Yuu pins him down with his surprisingly strong arms. This causes Asahi to panic more, and he can feel his breath leave him.  _ Shit _ , he thinks.  _ Shit shit shit, he’s going to leave me-- _

“Asahi. Answer me. I won’t be mad, but I don’t want you dancing around the subject any more, you’re not a very good dancer.” 

Asahi can’t even focus on the clever joke Yuu’s slipped into their otherwise serious conversation, he’s so scared. “I-- I...Yes. I’m a- asexual. I- I understand if you don’t want to date me any--” 

Asahi is cut off by Yuu’s lips pressing against his own. “You idiot.” 

“H- Huh?!” 

“You idiot! I don’t care about sex, I care about  _ you _ . You dope, you total  _ dope _ , don’t scare me like that, I thought you were  _ leaving _ me! I was so scared, until Ryuu suggested maybe you’re ace, because y’know Chikara is too, and oh my god,  _ Asahi I love you _ .” 

Yuu’s words are all so jumbled, Asahi can barely make them out, but he definitely hears the I love you. “I-- I love you too, Y- Yuu!” Asahi cries, tears welling up and spilling out. “I love you so much.” 

“God, you’re such a crybaby, Asahi,” Yuu sniffs, wifing away his own tears. “You really need to work on that.” 

Asahi laughs. “Yeah, I should.” 

He’ll get right on that, just as soon as he’s done kissing his boyfriend’s tears away. 


End file.
